Hey, I’m on a roll today. Go me.
Anyway, the title has to be one of my favorite quotes of all time. Now sit down, drop your self entitlement as your specialness just went down the drain, and learn!
Being somewhat highly introverted and socially inept to a point naturals and extroverts would be completely bamboozled by my inability to socialize I had no choice but to logically strip it all apart, inter-human relationships of all kinds. Why would one do that?! Well, to obtain profound understanding, that’s if you’re a rational person anyway. Granted, not all ISTPs are as dumb I am in that regard, but I’m sure most were at some point in their life. In that sense, Internet ISTP-Hi5!
In fact I at first I didn’t meant to analyze these things at all, as I had the habit of rationalizing too many things away, stripping myself of possible adventure and fun to be had, practical to the bone. Though, just because you have technical and analytical understanding it doesn’t have to lead rationalizing things away, as that’s an entirely separated process I’m responsible for – not the analyzing itself. I once said “I’m the master of small talk, for I don’t say a word.”, I couldn’t have been more accurate with that – lets face it, though – it’s not going to get me anywhere, ever. Changes only occur if you work towards them, things never fall into your lap. At least my lap doesn’t show much if that was the case. Well, moving on then.
The very bottom line is, whether or not you agree, humans aren’t much more than complex and variable machines, or robots so to speak. Some more complex than others, some may even truly unique, although that’s doubtful, but overall many people work the same way. You disagree? Well, fuck you then. If that made you upset, feel attacked, or anything of the like, you just proved my point. To make it simpler and more evident, though – if I was to meet you in a train and would punch you in the face for no good reason, you’d be pretty pissed at me, regardless of what your counteraction towards the punch would be. See? I give certain input and can expect certain output (action – reaction). In this example it’s likely that 90% of the males would stomp me into the ground for having hit them for no good reason, and who could blame them? Females probably give me a solid “what the fuck is wrong with you!”, much like bystanders and other witnesses would. You agree? Glad I got you onto the same page then.
Admittedly, punching someone in the face is a bit drastic, but it was an example to carry the point home. This is however no different from socializing. Socializing at its bone is nothing else but manipulation, not necessarily with malicious intends, but manipulation none the less. You don’t agree? Well, fuck you again then. An example would be asking a random person on the street what time it is – if you aren’t a complete moron chances are you’ll take the nice approach. “Good day Sir/Ma’am, would you mind telling me what time it is?” – we approach the person in question in a nice manner, as we expect and equal gesture in return, since humans are wired that way. You approach me nice, I response nice. You could also go and ask him this way; “Yo, homeboy, gimme the time please, bro” and chances are people will look at you weird rather than giving you what you’ve asked for – we naturally choose the approach that’s likely to yield the desired outcome, we’re all playing the game.
Now, what is friendship then? Analytically seen it’s rather simple. It’s two people that benefit each other in the loosest sense of the word. Friendship is tied to a social standard and obligations that are manipulation all in itself, due to exactly these. Meaning if you ask a favor as a friend you have a different expectation as to what answer you’ll receive, while the peer in question knows that being a friend may means biting the sour apple at times, so the peer is pressured by his obligatory status to give in to the request, assuming it’s nothing too extraordinary. Here some people may claim “but I love to help out a friend in need”, or “I’m helpful by nature” – I call crap on that, though. It may be true that this applies to you, but because you like it as it provides you with fulfillment and joy, it makes you happy, feel appreciated. Basically you do it indirectly for your own well-being rather than the other person’s (at best equally distributed, unless “in love”), whether or not it’s a conscious progress in your brain. Not meaning to be demeaning by any means, we’re all the same egoistic pricks, just some more evidently than others. We’re all out for our own well-being first and foremost, I’m no different.
Don’t misunderstand me though, I’m not implying any of this was bad, quite the opposite in fact. There’s nothing wrong about two peers equally benefiting each other if the resonance is a pleasant one.
Socializing is all about giving input and receiving output, ideally the desired output – so begin learning what the correct input has to be to accomplish what you’re looking for.
Speaking of “The Game” we’re all playing, it was an awesome read, in fact the first book I’ve ever genuinely read from cover to cover, last but not least because I put my nerd pride on the line here, losing the game isn’t an option, not for me anyway. So, what’s the book about? The Game is basically telling you a story about a Pickup-Artist (PUA) community. Not only is it hilarious in its humor, but also underlines my analytical thoughts of human interaction. Since socializing at its very core is manipulation you just have to learn how people function, and once you do know it becomes easy to get what you want. Once you learn what input to give for the desired outcome you basically become a master of socializing. While the book focuses on getting laid for most part, it takes an interesting, and the all the better turn towards the end and its moral of the story.
While I recommend this book to almost anyone I’m not advocating the PUA lifestyle, at all. The book even differentiates between “naturals” and “non-naturals” itself. There are people who naturally got “it” that enables them to draw people towards them, and there are those, like me, and perhaps plenty other introverted thinkers, who need a system to work with that makes sense in their head. Given the book’s turn towards the end and the natural nature of an ISTP, all I can say, to fellow ISTP’s anyway, we don’t play the game by nature, and we shouldn’t bother getting into it. Yet the self-improvement parts of the books and the analytical structure of the story are rather valuable information for the more inept ones of us, especially if you decide to abstract and apply them in a broader way than simply getting laid, or a date.
Well, ISTPs are said to be late bloomers to begin with, so with my almost 23 I hope I’m almost there. The book itself isn’t related to personality types at all, or myer-briggs and the like, although combining the two only makes it all the more entertaining in terms of a intellectual pursuit.
Moving on to my last agenda. The topic of love. Yes, love. What is love? Do you know? Do I know? Is it individually definable? As mentioned in my previous entry I consider it a lifestyle, it being a choice for most part, rather than what the term of love is often used as synonym for these days, which would be “infatuation”. They’re two completely different things. Infatuation is not love, but a situation caused by your hormones going nuts. Once settled down infatuation either does turn into love, or it vanishes without leaving a trace of itself. Bottom line being however, infatuation is not a state of being that could be upheld permanently – assuming it was possible, though, it could be considered the most beautiful suicide option out there, as death would kind of be inevitable if you were infatuated for really long periods of time.
So what’s my message here? Nothing really, but perhaps for you to re-think a few things about yourself and your views in regards to that topic. I’ve skipped the whole teenager lovey dovey crap for a reason back in highschool, apparently only to realize though, that it seems to be no different from back then now that I’m approaching my mid 20′s. Can’t wait to be 30 I guess, at least within there lie my hopes of things taking a turn for the better.
Though, it’s not exactly upsetting me, I take it with the grain of salt it’s meant to be taken with – so ultimately I get entertained by people faceplanting all over the world in their naivety.
Since love is a choice, or arguably an action in itself, you’re best of to ditch whatever Disney managed to plant inside your heads. Now, I’m not saying romantic love didn’t exist, as it obviously does, it however is an entirely different form of love than love in itself, and none I’d be willing to be practice, not for longer periods of time anyway. In that sense the desired romantic love may not have a longer longevity than the aforementioned infatuation period – in fact, at times, they may be even one and the same thing.
Ah well, enough of that, though.
I’ve long obtained the wisdom of knowing that a fair share of people are lost causes and won’t even necessarily learn through first hand mistakes. I take comfort in the thought that those may or may not become wiser as they become older, though this may means these insights come too late, although one simply could have understood and agreed with me.
Good Day!
